Hashgate.



Run Number:

1439

Visit the website – http://berkshirehash.co.uk
Website Email –
iceman@berkshirehash.co.uk

Venue:

The Turners Arms
Mortimer

Hare:

Spot

Hot Blokes, Hot Women… and Twanky

Robert Donut Honeymonster Hashgate ScarletPimpernel James and dog Moffy Foghorn BlowJob Centaur Chopstix Soreskin Gabby Viv Iceman Simple DunnyStumbler ShutupWally (without his friend…) Caboose Hamlet ShitShoveller Twanky David Utopia Uplift Dutch CIAC (Short for Come In A Car) HeyBabe Nicola and son Luke Cheating Posh Bomber SlowSucker BoP Fiddler Itsyor Cloggs Bex Kris HeadBoy Helena Chris and dog Bracken Dwight Mudman Mrs Mudman

A Spot-On Hash

It must have been a hot night. Even the ice-cool Posh turned up in shorts, displaying a finely turned pair of alabaster-smooth legs marred only, as Bomber pointed out, by a couple of scratches that some very low-class brambles had dared to inflict on her aristocratic calves. Uplift also turned up with Utopia in a fine little Panda car that she was very reluctant to park in a space wider than the QE2. In a schoolmistressly way she stepped out and told me to ‘get on with it’ which I did with only a slight clashing of gears and a lip-biting Utopia in the passenger seat.

Spot’s simple but masterly route initially fooled the long runners by looping round the field next to the pub because ‘it always goes this way’. It didn’t and the short cutters stole a march on the FRBs by haring off into the green stuff on the other side of the road. Mention must go to new boy David who was leading the Hash at one point – even though he had no idea what he was doing! We Checked and Back Checked before slipping through the middle of a field of corn, peaceful sky above and hot air balloon drifting languidly in the distance. This is what Hashing is all about, even with ShutupWally’s incessant squawking – he was saying how he was surprised that his ‘friend’ Delmar had seemed reluctant to be given a lift by him. Can’t think why.

The first of the Regroups appeared and most of the FRBs went to view the nearby Roman amphitheatre, now much drier than the last time we ran through it. The Long runners disappeared and HeyBabe, Nicola, Luke, Viv etc were directed by Donut along the Short trail. Well, kind of. She admitted her knowledge of the route was, well, sketchy. Youngster Luke led us all along the Roman wall round Calleva Atribatum (Silchester) to Spot’s thoughtful water stop where we tried to drink as much as possible before the FRBs caught up and Twanky tried chatting me up…again! After a trot past what appeared to be the Tardis hidden in the bushes by the car park (actually a portable toilet), a nice walk and chat with Simple and some abuse by BlowJob and Cloggs as they skipped by we got back to the welcoming pub and a very welcome pint! Many thanks Spot. A good trail, as ever.

Down Downs

Foghorn kindly stood in as RA and presented the following :-

Name

Reason

Style points

David, Chris & ?

Newcomers to the Hash

David exhibited stunning speed

Uplift, Hashgate

Not parking…and parking

Amazingly, I actually won! A first.

Blowjob

Getting her head down!

A reasonable effort

Iceman, ShutupWally

Iceman gave the Sheep to Wally for pulling a muscle

Excellent by Iceman. An awful face pulled by Wally

Spot, Donut

Hare and helper

Donut’s water ended up over Foghorn

Up and Coming

Run Number

Date

Grid Reference

Venue

Hares

----

Sunday 11:00
03/07/05

655649
(Parking)

The Fun Run!
At Mr & Mrs Blobby’s (652651)

Motox

1441

04/07/05

793640

The Queen’s Oak
Finchampstead

Itsyor
Fiddler

1442

11/07/05

917621

Lightwater Country Park

ShutupWally
Honeymonster