Run Number 1320 09/03/03

Venue The Restoration Hare: Motox

Oxford Road


Almost the Reading Half Marathon !

News Flash

Record Number of Runners seen on Berks Hash trail !

“An estimated 9,018 runners were seen following the flour trail down Ivydean Road into Portman Road. We believe this to be a record unlikely to be exceeded even at InterHash 2004 in Cardiff. Most along with Bomber, Posh and Arnie seemed to lose the trail at the check in Cow Lane. Only 18 managed to find the correct On-Inn ”

– from our local news correspondent - Motox

The Gallant Eighteen

Baldrick, BGB, Cloggs + Kevin, Chopsticks, Cheating, Dribbler, Flash, Foghorn, (return of the) Greenfly, Honeymonster, Iceman, Miss Whiplash, Pinky, Slow Sucker, Smurf, Spot plus hare Motox.

A ‘Marathon’ in Two Halves

Only a reduced number managed to navigate the road closures to meet at the Restoration so the small car park presented no problems. Just prior to the start the hare emerges clutching a bag of flour and is able to tell all that it was ‘flour and on’ and no more than 50m from the check! They don’t get much easier than that.

So of the pack go west along the Oxford road and promptly get confused and missing a bar check. A left turn took the pack up through a grassy strip, past a garden complete with railway signals which all duly obeyed before crossing the ‘road’ – as instructed by the hare at the start. This direct ascent route delivered us to McIlroy park which we proceeded to circle anti-clockwise mostly through the trees and surprisingly healthy brambles and a certain amount of soft stuff. At this point Flash seemed to be lagging to the concern of the Hare but caught up at Norcot Road.

Crossing the road, the pack (less short cutters) plunged into more woods, this time with decidedly sticky mud and steep slopes. Here Chopsticks exposed her green credentials by hugging trees. One particularly glutanous patch sported a clean splotch of flour but no sign of hasher, or hare for that matter, having crossed it – they’re not fools you know. A precipitous slope found Cloggs and Baldrick’s shoes providing less than ideal grip leading to a short slide – with consequent brown muddy bums . Cloggs found Kevin’s bum a good place to clean up drawing a comment from Foghorn that they were getting it wrong.

Up to this point the trail was as cross-country as usual but now we hit the tarmac. After threading our way through schools and housing estates – familiar to Wednesday Whingers perhaps – we emerged just short of the Oxford road where we found a few (thousand) other runners who seemed to like our trail. Across the Oxford Road, down Ivydean Road to Portman Road we were cheered and clapped and forced to keep up with the sprightly pace. At this point the pack regrouped and tried to find the lost members with some spotting Arnie.

A long / short split began here which most followed all the way down PortmanRoad, with Greenfly and Cheating off to the left checking the various bridges under the railway – but no to was to the very bottom, under both set of tracks and a check at the end of Cow Lane. Seemed to lose most of the runners here (?) but we intrepid few soldiered on down the lane past the Reading Festival site to the Thames, up the towpath to the boatyard and back to the Pub. This proved to be quite a ‘marathon’ and after keeping up with the ‘other’ runners ‘8 minute mile’ pace many were running on empty.

With cheap bar prices at the pub all were able to fill up and Spot, the RA for the day, bought four and a half ‘proper’ pints and produced one ‘tinned’ special for the hare which we know he loves so much. ON ON Baldrick

Down Downs



Style Points

Miss Whiplash

For not leaving early enough to avoid the street closures and pick up Salome

Fine style
– clearly been practising


Claiming “I’m no Namby Pamby” when being offered a short cut but later running with the halfmarathoners

Once we managed to drag him from his van – slow and requiring two goes


Crossing a bar check in the woods. Well the RA was a little foggy about who it was so ‘Foggy’ fitted the bill.

No problems


For getting ‘trapped’ inside the half-marathon circuit.

Only a half – of course.


For being a half-hour late

Again a half was approparaite.

Motox - Hare

Letting 9,000 gatecrashers onto the trail.

His favourite beer straight from the can.

Swift and sure.

Up and Coming

Run Number


Grid Reference




16 March


The Cross Eversley Cross

NOTE : Pub name has changed from The Toad & Stump



23 March


The Naples Alternative

The Royal Oak,

Westwood Glen, Tilehurst



6 April


The Dew Drop Inn

Honey Lane, Ashley Hill