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The Ship Ashford Hill


Mr Blobby & Harry

The Shower

Swallow Baldrick Tinopener Lilo Lil Cerberis BillyBullshit Vertigo Motox BlouseBlazer Spot Dumper Non-Stick Cloggs Itsyor Fiddler Handful Centaur Old Dog Simple Dunny Zebedee Florence Potty Nutty(NR) Lemming Mother Quack Fannypack Bogbrush Jwax Shitshoveller Penny Pitstop Loudontasteless Nick Whinge(NR) TC Mhaire C5 Slowsucker Scarlet Pimpernel Rosamund(Mrs SP) Utopia Uplift Mrs Blobby Hitch-hiker Hamlet Slackbladder Little Stiffy Max Nappy Rash Penispuller Shutup Wally Escort Bomber Posh TT2 Bob Liz Poison Ivy Trainspotter Anorak Lonely Bootsie

Raindrops keep falling on their heads!

The rain god C5 told me last weekend that rain puts people off from coming to the Hash! Clearly this hasn’t sunk in with the 60 odd (and yes you can take that in more than one way!) people who assembled at the pub. Yes it should be noted that the BH3 youth recruitment policy is failing and more than a few attendees will be suffering early stage dementia even full blown Alzheimer’s but not everybody! Three people (Liz, Bob and Rosamund aka Mrs Scarlet Pimpernel) chose to lose their virginity today – the madness is clearly spreading.

And talking of mad the first person who intruded into my personal space was Shut up Wally who was pestering Hare Harry claiming to be checking up on his trail laying skills! This involved describing himself as like Craig Revill Horwood one of the judges from Strictly Come Dancing. It was not clear which of this particular gentleman’s traits he was referring to – His sexuality or being a rude prat nevertheless Harry wisely ignored him. As for his trail laying skills under the tuition of the “Blobmeister” all I can say is that he lost the aforementioned irritant and we were left playing ”Where’s Wally” for the rest of the morning! Excellent!

It was cold and it was wet GM Mr Charisma soon passed us onto the Hares to speed us on our way and after a loop through the water meadows and the now obligatory “Field Check” which was remarkably successful, we were into the woods across the road and the copious shiggy.

I don’t think it is necessary to go into too many details of the delights of the trail suffice it to say it wound in and out of the woods through increasingly deeper shiggy and was interspersed by small neat little checks(A bit like Mr Blobby) which were mainly ignored by the front running bastards!

One of the more bizarre moments came at the first re-group where Centaur, Spot, Nappy Rash, Billy BS amongst others appeared from completely the other direction from where the pack had arrived. They as always claimed to be on flour. This became a bit of a theme for the morning as much the same group disappeared up their own fundament on several more occasions. The siren calls of Billy trying to lure the unsuspecting, could be heard in the distance and always from the wrong direction and only in the interludes (brief) when Old Dog was quiet.

So successful was this deliberate or otherwise ploy that a similar group arrived so late at the second re-group that it had moved on. The lack of FRBs at the front kept the pack together very well as they waited moistly at each check awaiting guidance from the Hares or for one the more frisky hashers i.e. Fiddler or Itsyor to arrive.

One downside of the weather and conditions and the slower pace was that Lemming was able to indulge himself in his favourite pastime of mud splashing though at the end it was difficult to tell who had been “got” as we were all wet and bedraggled and very muddy. It would have been great to have one of those infra red cameras as the plume of heat loss from the follicly challenged would have been vast today.

Despite the cold it was well up to the standard of “rubbish” trails we have come to expect from Mr Blobby and helper and and Sundays wouldn’t be Sundays without getting annoyed at GM Blouseblazer not calling, not following the trail, appearing from the wrong direction, running over falses etc. After all as some wag always points out “There are no rules!”

And finally to the pub which was warm and full of people who short cutted back to the dry (Hamlet!) plus Whinge who hadn’t bothered at all and turned up with his Dad. Did somebody say “Chip off the old block?”

Lock up your daughters (Actually your Mothers and Grandmothers as well!)

On a serious note I’m sure you will join with me in wishing Fukawe a quick recovery and we look forward to seeing her again soon.

Joint Hash Camra 2007 2nd December – Sonning Common Village Hall

Sample Butler’s finest beers + Food + Xmas Pud. £4 for food and run(s). Book in with C5. Beer £1 a pint. Bring plate, cutlery, and drinking vessel. The Air Ambulance will be on stand-by!

On On. Slowsucker:

Down Downs

Simple presented the following:-



Style points

Hamlet Bogbrush Uplift(Gone Home!)

Birthday Girls and Boys

Some in the moustache for later(Not Uplift!)


2nd Old Git in Clarendon Half

Like an athlete.

Scarlet & Rosamund

Mr and Mrs

It’s nice to see old folk doing things together!

Bob and Liz

The Virgins

Not Bad



Still protesting!

Bogbrush took beer with Anorak, Cloggs, Slowsucker et al and then cruelly picked on Slowsucker for allegedly cheating! Now would he do that?

Mr Blobby

The Hares

Down the hatch

Up and Coming



Grid Reference






Sonning Common Village Hall

Wood Lane RG4 9SL

Cheating but mainly and Company




The Pelican Pamber Heath

RG26 3EC

C5 and Slowsucker