The Hashers

Bogbrush, FannyBag, Old Dog, Cerberus, Billy Liar, Motox, No Sole, Slapper, Whinge, TC, Honeymonster and Max, Awol, BGB, Cheating, Clogs, Foghorn, Iceman, Lunchbox, Lemming, Miss Whiplash, Mother, Salome, Spex, Spot, Trembler, Knee Trembler (again non payees) Triple Nipple and Corgi, Ben and Tim Ralph, Doggy Stile, Dripping Dick, Bum Wiper and John, Virgin Mandy. Guest appearance Dumpers and Septic.

The Half Marathon’s for wimps so let’s do a Hash instead….

Today’s run was a challenge in many ways. Lovely spring morning, flowers blooming, blooming road works everywhere, blooming roads closed everywhere, Spot even camped the night just to make sure he was there on time…. TC had to cycle because Whinge couldn’t get his Big End to work….(don’t they have little blue tablets for that???? Or do you need spanners to tighten those nuts???

Speaking of which Spex arrived with a charming young man in tow who let it slip that Spex was ‘round at his place the night before’ and that this was a cunning plan to try and make L’n’T come more often….Oooh I say…!

Anyway, for those of us not ski-ing or doing ‘that run’ it was a great day for doing huge loops of trail that got us right back to where we started…. I thought I had been running really well up that first hill, down the other side, down a false, missing a check, and round all sorts of roads, only to find I was back at the pub…. And we still had another six miles to go…. It was the theme of the trail it seems with huge falses (speaking of which, where is the undergarment and single protuberance by the way?) and a cunning lack of flour.

Methinks this is a new phase of trail laying, probably the Dutch Method, where flour was only laid after the runners had gone by….. which was great for us shirkers at the back because the FRBs always seemed to come from behind….

Lemming was in his element today and we should have guessed this was so by the number of puddles in the pub car park. As usual, it was the ladies who benefitted from the free mud packs and I suspect quite a few wrinkles and laughter lines will be somewhat reduced tomorrow. I don’t think we were ever more than 500 yards from a 500 yard stretch of 6inch deep mud. Skinny Dipper had even arranged for the quad bike practice the day before to really churn up the bit right at the bottom of this huge track… everyone really loved that!

There was much muttering and mumbling about the lack of flour, falses leading right back to the checks and where the heck was Billy???

No one saw any sign of him after the start…. But rumour has it the log he was dragging got caught up in the first stile and he spent the next hour and a half trying to undo the knots….

The views were great…. Well they would be at the top of all those blooming hills we ran up, the shiggy was first rate; slimy, smelly and spreadable. The abuse was fairly normal; no flour, hidden falses, irate landowners shouting, dog abuse (see below), muddy dogs and hash crashes (Bum Wiper) but the Virgin wants to come again, so another lamb to fold!!!

Be aware that the gauntlet has been thrown down though and BGB promises that next week’s trail (the one you have just done if you are reading this on Sunday) will have even less flour… you have been warned! Woof woof!

On On. Hashgate’s a broad so it must be Old Dog???

Down Downs

RA S***forBrains presented the following :-

Went where???  Like his beer, down the drain in a flash

Up and Coming

Hash NewsFlash – Next Hash walk is on Sunday April 18 – See Motox for details….