The Hashers

Doughnut, Old Dog, Flo, Zeb, Twanky, Paul, Spot, TT4, Hitch-hiker, Lunchbox, Ann, Cheating, CabinBuoy, Blojob, L&T, Spex, Mr and Mrs Blobby, Utopia, Shandyman, Dunny, Rampant, Simple, Potty, Snowballs, Mags, Flash, Iceman, Cerberus, Baldrick, Caboose, Just Moist, Gusset and May, Centaur, Miss Whiplash, Dribbler, Butterfly, Max, Awol, Centaur, Tinopener, Lilo and Minx, Swallow, Slowsucker, Slackbladder, Little Stiffy, C5, Slapper, No Sole, Dwight & son, Bogbrush, Fannybag, GT, PQ, Motox, Fiddler, Pocahontas (with large football under shirt) and Martin

The Hash – It was PANTS!

Pants: adverb/noun etc. : not cool, gaudy check trousers worn by loud Americans, what Hashers do at the sight of a well turned ankle, what dogs do (especially Old ones) when hot and bothered. Then of course there are pink frilly ones (Gusset – optional) like the ones to cause sharp intakes of breath on Wimbledon’s Centre Court, big crutch to armpit jobs (quite a lot of blokes really) the sort that send Hugh Grant’s pulse racing, eye-catchingly bright (Mrs B, Mags, Utopia etc) the sort that were really hip and happening in the 80’s, right down to the ‘gosh which way round does this g string go – it makes my lunchbox look big, not arf!!’ (Nutty and Rampant)

Yes, it was the big knicker run and as usual everyone stepped up to the plate bar the usual culprits, Cheating, Spot etc who swore blind they did have them but were just being discrete… mmmmm. I didn’t see many people tucking their vests in though, was it because it was too hot for vests or simply at our age there ain’t enough room in the pants for vests as well as trusses and Tenas……

There was much, ‘does my bum look big in this’ and ‘look at those meat and two veg’ and ‘please put it away thank you’…. The pub customers were much entertained and couldn’t wait to see what happened when we got back from the run…

So looking like Superman whose unmentionables were having a day off at the laundry the hash loped off to find the new pant shaped (or Y-front shaped) checks and 3 pairs of pants with Skids…. That Nutty had strewn hither and thither round the environs of Thatcham and the canal.

To the usual cries of ‘it always goes this way’ the FRBs did the honourable thing and went the wrong way and we started off at a firm pace along the canal. Don’t ask me what actually happened because I was walking and although Hashgate gave me the Dictaphone it contains such heavy breathing I am too shy to ask what was going on…

I believe Flash fell over at one point because he was running so fast… look to your Laurels Fiddler! Motox, make a note for the forthcoming Fun Run on the 19^th. Methinks Flash could be a worthy contender for the sacred loo seat!

Oh and Iceman, we need to make sure the Web pages are kept up to date. Not only is Motox surfing the web but Flash is checking it out online too. He made some pointed comments about Moonlights and BLT info not being up to date so take heed… I ask you, these retired people with nothing but time on their hands to visit dodgy web sites!

Did anyone actually find the missing pants? More to the point, who took them home to wash them?

Hashgate now has a permanent grin…. For years being pointed at and told he was much too thin he was strutting his stuff in a size 16 thong!!! Ladies the Lunchbox has landed…. Truth be he had it on back to front but Doughnut didn’t have the heart to tell him.

TT4 really took the biscuit though… having parked neatly to ensure that no-one brushed his beloved wheels he was seen later moving it again to the other end of the car park away from everyone else. Has someone put a little dent in it or what?

On On. Hashgate, him with the dic-to-phone and me with the keyboard.

Down Downs

RA C5 presented the following :-

Style and panache rule

Up and Coming