Berkshire Hash House Harriers 



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The Dukes head


Twanky, Skids

The Confused

Shifty Jill Donut Hashgate Booby SimpleSlapper NoSole Iceman OldFart Itsyor 2Bob and dog Lucy Puddleduck FullFrontal Blowjob Fannybag Bogbrush Spot Ms Whiplash SkinnyDipper Bumwiper and dog Ebony Honeymonster Whinge TC Cerberus BillyBullshit Desperate Chopstix Shandyman Uplift Utopia C5 Tequilova Hotlips Lonely Snowy Slippery Foghorn Horny Caboose AWOL

The Hash Quiz 2013

It was all very complicated for BH3. Parking in the pub car park, unless you got there early like I did, was limited and you had to turn round and go elsewhere. Twanky and Simple had organised a two-part quiz – one for walkers; one for runners. Blue flour for one group; white flour for the other. There were two sets of questions, all neatly typed in a numbered table with a Question column and an answer column. Skids separated us into the two groups and handed out the sheets. Hashers peered at the papers gormlessly, turning them over and over, Those who could read moved a finger slowly across the words, lips moving soundlessly. Skids took a deep breath and issued her instructions with care. Essentially, when we got to a Check there would be visible an answer to one of the clues. “Are the Checks in the same order as the question numbers?” Squeaked a voice. Skids raised her eyes briefly to the grey skies, threatening rain, and answered in her best primary teacher voice that they were. She went on to advise us that Checks with an ‘X’ in were just ordinary Checks not associated with a quiz question. “What if the Checks are round a lamp post?” piped up another voice. Poor Skids. It was noticeable that Twanky kept well in the background.

Before we get into the Trail there were two questions that went unanswered tonight: 1) why did Puddleduck think he could get away with turning up wearing the brightest canary yellow running shoes ever seen on the Hash? and 2) what the hell did Foghorn think he was doing, wearing signal read and virgin white hooped, knee-length socks? Neither question was answered satisfactorily… which matched many of those on the quiz sheets.

We On Outed into the largely tarmac wilderness that is Wokingham.

Umm. We did what it said on the tin, as it were. Ran from Check to Check attempting to answer the questions. Unlike our usual Trails the focus was all on getting to the next Check and figuring out answers to cryptic questions that would have foxed a regular Time crossword finisher. Let me give you a couple of examples. Question 3, early on was as follows: “Which seed ‘de-feets’ time?” The Check was by the tree-shrouded entrance to a local park and there was exactly zip to see that could even remotely be connected with with this unfathomable query. As we scurried gloomily hither and thither Skids scattered before us a crumb of assistance. “I did say that the answers would be visible from the Check. You can’t necessarily see them straight away.” Ah ha! We spread out a little wider and… bingo! There was a sundial clock where one could stand in the middle on two footmarks. When the sun was out one’s shadow pointed to the time. And it was entitled an acorn clock. The second arcane clue was thus: “Pat’s Saturday pick-up?” The check was next to a bare T-junction with nothing that inspired us… until Foghorn and I spotted a post box, carefully hidden behind a bush. The Saturday collection time was 11:30. We marked it on our sheets and hurried away before anyone else cottoned on.

As you can see, this was the pattern of our Quiz Hash. It was quite interesting for Donut who lives in the area and was delighted when we ran, for the first time ever, quite near her house. She learned (as did we) a couple of things about Wokingham that she had never known. The original footbridge over the railway by the station was made of re-used rails and the Nationwide Building Society office is located in the old Electric Cinema with the blue plaque on the side wall. Fascinating stuff.

When we finally returned to the pub Twanky collected up all the quiz sheets, ready for marking. The collective Hash sat sipping beer, hearts beating, breath shortening, adreneline levels rising as they anticipated with growing excitement the announcement of the winners. Oh, all right, we lounged around enjoying the food and drink and chatting idly.

And the Walkers second place went to the UN team (Utopia and NoSole – geddit) who were awarded a selection of Wokingham picture postcards.

First place went to Cerberus and Simple who received stupendously attractive apostle spoons.

The Runners first place went to Hotlips and Uplift who received more of those apostle spoons.

This was a thoroughly enjoyable evening and we must thank Twanky and Skids for their work and organisation. Cheers both!

On On.  Hashgate.

Down Downs

… were presented (indoors again – nice idea) by our R.A. Shitfor.

Who Got It

Why and How They Did


Too shy to tell her friend her Hash name. Why on earth? J


He took 5 minutes to do her zip up after she asked him for help. Billy was also wearing a lurid Hawaian shirt, believing it was to be next week’s Hash – doh!


Led the R.A. a merry dance by confusing question 18 with 17.

Shandyman, Chopstix

Tonight’s R2D2 visitors.

Twanky, Skids

Tonight’s quizmasters (er, mistresses)


Awarded a Down by Skids for being a pain in the a*se all night



Up and Coming



Grid Reference






Hashes to Ashes” Remembrance Run
Yattendon Village Hall
RG16 0UE
£1 / £2 tick for members/ non members. BYOBeer

BGB, Dumper,
Tin Opener, MotoX & Flo




BH3's Hash in the 8 in 8 in 8 Series
The Royal Oak
Hydes Platt, Ecchinswell, RG20 4UH